Series One - Episode Thirteen: A World in Tatters

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C.A.B Episodes

Episode Details

UK Air Date: Tuesday 16th December 1986, 16.20pm
Copyright Year: MCMLXXXVI (1986)
Consecutive Episode Number: 13
Fremantle Archive Ref: 33211
IMDB Link: Episode page

Cast & Crew

Images

Episode Synopsis

Strange noises are heard from the empty room above the shop. The thieves arrive and Colin and Franny are forced to hide under the table with Tatters the cat. Ma Mossop mysteriously reappears and a strange blue bead begins to glow, casting a spell over everyone in the room. Tatters becomes the centre of attention. Who will get the map? Who will get the postcard? Who will get the treasure?

Episode Guide

'This is Secret Agent C.A.B reporting. And code breaker Franny the Brill. Well we've gone over and over all the facts of this mystery, we haven't always agreed and we're no nearer to solving it. Every time things seem to make sense something happens to upset our ideas. The problem is that none of the visitors to the shop can be trusted. There's Mr Johann Hellman and his funny SQEECS organisation, he now says he's with the CIA. And then there's Smith, with all those disguises, who says he's from MI5. And Anwar, who's very helpful but admits he's not on our side. And then there's Ma, what has she got to do with all this? And why does that weird hospital keep calling her Major? I wish we were closer to solving this mystery. It's getting on our nerves and we're starting to fight with each other.

In the front shop Franny hears loud footsteps, Franny calls out to Colin. He walks in and Franny tells him someone is walking about upstairs as she can hear footsteps, Colin dismisses it saying 'upstairs, there can't be, it's condemned, you're imagining things again'. They walk into the back shop as they argue, Colin finishes by saying, 'everything scares you'. Franny picks up one of the books from the table as if to throw it at Colin but she stops and sees that the book is Peter Pan. Franny realises something and asks Colin to pass the photo of the man in the desert. Colin passes her the photo and Franny surmises that the P.P.P on the clue is 'P for Peter, P for Pan and P for page'. Franny reads the rest of the clue 'One Two Buckle my shoe. Forget the rest, just pick up sticks'. Colin says it's stupid and Franny agrees.

Smith just leaves the Washington pub as he notices Anwar walking down the street who is being followed by Mr Hellman, Smith dives back into the doorway out of view. Anwar stops to look in a shop window and Mr Hellman does the same, Anwar glances over towards Hellman and smiles. Anwar walks past where Smith is hiding, stops and Mr Hellman hides in the doorway and notices Smith. When Mr Hellman and Smith step out from the doorway Anwar is nowhere to be seen, Smith runs towards the street corner and runs off to find Anwar as Hellman follows him. Smith and Hellman run past without seeing Anwar, knowing he has lost them Anwar smiles.

Back in the shop Franny tells Colin 'I think I get it', she asks him to put on the light. Colin does so after Franny tells him again to put on the light. Franny then explains 'the rhyme goes one two buckle my shoe, three four knock at the door, five six pick up sticks'. Colin says that he knows that. Franny continues 'so one two buckle my shoe, put down the one and then the two. Forget the rest, that means forget the rest of the rhyme, just pick up sticks'. Colin questions 'so what'? Franny tells him 'pick up six, six'. Colin says 'very clever'. Franny reasons that it must be on page one two six. Colin again questions 'so what'? Franny tells him there must be a message hidden in the story. Franny turns the pages in the book to page one hundred and twenty six and finds a paragraph which is the marker for the treasure, she reads out loud the paragraph 'I forget whether I've told you that there was a stave in the rock, driven into it by some buccaneers of long ago to mark the site of buried treasure', Franny continues talking 'stave in a rock, Colin this is it'. Colin questions 'what'? Franny tells him 'the most important thing, the map tells you where to go, this tells you where to look for the treasure, underneath the rock with a stave in it'. Colin says 'even if they get the map they won't know where to look and we do, yippee. We know where to look Tatters and they don't, we'll show them'. They hear a rattling sound from the front shop, Franny replies 'if we live that long', she turns off the light and suggests 'quick, out the back' but they hear the sound of something falling over outside and as someone tries to enter the door handle moves. Colin realises 'we're trapped', he picks up Tatters and they go into the front shop, someone is trying the get in the front door. Colin suggests 'quick, under there', they hide under a table covered by a large table cloth.

The front door opens and Smith walks in, turns on his torch and begins to look around, he pushes some books from another table onto the floor. He continues to look and stands by the table Colin, Franny and Tatters are hiding under, he moans 'it's got to be somewhere, blast' as he pushes more items onto the floor. The light comes on and Smith looks round, he sees Hellman who says 'temper, temper'. Smith asks what he is doing in the shop, Hellman answers 'shopping'. Smith tells him 'the shop is shut, mate'. Hellman tells him 'for you yes Mr Smith. You've interfered just once too often'. In defence Smith brandishes the torch, Hellman offers Smith a mint telling him that he's rather partial to them. Anwar walks in from the back shop saying 'you always were, weren't you number four seven two three seven'? Smith retorts 'this place is becoming as busy as Piccadilly Circus'. They hear footsteps from upstairs, they look up as the sound of footsteps gets closer and music begins to play. Hellman realises the music is 'Lili Marleen'. The cupboard door swings open and a panel at the back slides across, Ma Mossop walks through. Ma Mossop greets them 'well, well Gentlemen, quite a party. I hope you haven't any previous engagements because nobody's going anywhere'. Ma Mossop presses a button on a gadget she's holding, she cupboard door closes and the front and back doors lock shut, Ma continues 'all the exits are now locked'. Hellman protests and tries the front door but gets an electric shock from the door, Ma Mossop counters 'you decided to stay, good'. Ma Mossop continues 'now I know we all want the same thing, a certain map, yes. And I know we'll all stop at nothing to get it'. Anwar tells them that the last resting place of the great pharaoh must never be revealed and it is his duty to see to that. Ma Mossop explains 'I who am not I'. Anwar asks how she knows that, Ma Mossop tells them 'I know everything, I've heard every word you've been saying in this shop, all of you. My hearing aid, gentlemen, this is a receiver for the transmitter in the tape recorder that I gave to the boy, so you see'. Under the table Colin gets his dictaphone. Anwar says he can sense that the map is near and Hellman tells him that is why there are all here in the shop.

Colin whispers into his dictaphone 'this is agent C.A.B, if you can hear me say the code words, a cup of tea, over'. After hearing this Ma suggests 'Now Mr Anwar, why don't we discuss this over a nice cup of tea'. Smith repeats 'a nice cup of tea' as Anwar repeats that the map is near. Colin whispers into his dictaphone 'Ma we're very near you, what do you want us to do'? 'Just wait' Ma responds, Smith questions her 'wait, wait for what'? Ma tells him, 'wait 'til you're my age, you'll feel the need of a nice cup of tea'. Anwar places the blue bead onto a table as Ma calls out his name, 'Anwar, Anwar'. The blue bead begins to glow, the mummy sarcophagus is seen, Anwar's face is shown in the bead, the shop is shrouded in the blue light from the bead. Anwar begins 'Red of blood, black of dark, pulse of life, gift of death, by shadow of wings, by cool of water, by cry of vulture, by howl of hyena, I am not I. I am guardian of our King. Thousands of summers, quick sands of time, millions of days, numberless midnights, I who am not I never slumber. Every grain of sand, every hair on head, every breath of life, remember'. The bead continues to glow, Anwar's face and the mummy sarcophagus are seen, Anwar continues 'Sun of gold, moon of silver, sea of salt, earth of clay, oh eeh Ra'. Affected by the blue bead Hellman says 'blue, blue, Clarke, Nobby Clarke'. Anwar address him 'Sergeant Clarke'. Hellman answers 'Yes, explosion, room revealed, door guarding inner chamber' Anwar continues 'sealed, bolted top and bottom, fastened with cord'. Hellman adds 'tied to metal staples, sealed with a clay seal, a funeral seal'. Anwar chants 'Nebkheperure, Nebkheperure'. Hellman answers 'Nebkheperure, the name of the boy King, and then, and then'. Anwar prompts 'and then'. Hellman continues 'sweet music, sensors, they all'. Anwar spits out 'he robbed the sacred place'. Hellman defends himself 'Nobby Clarke was young'. Anwar states 'you robbed'.

The blue light vanishes from the shop, Hellman continues 'one blue bead, a little souvenir to send to his cousin'. Anwar adds 'and then he made a map'. Hellman tells them 'Nobby Clarke never had a happy moment after that time, he knew Anwar and Amdad was on his track. Smith questions 'what'? Anwar answers 'my great and honoured father', he asks Hellman 'so'? Hellman tells him 'so Nobby Clarke simply disappeared, he changed his identity'. Anwar explains 'You are Sergeant Clarke'. Franny whispers to Colin under the table 'Mr Hellman'. Ma asks Hellman 'cousin'? Hellman replies 'yes, cousin'. Smith frustratingly says 'what a charming reunion, come on, we've wasted enough time with all this history, where's the map'? Hellman tells him 'the map, Mr Smith, belongs to me'. Anwar states 'the map must be destroyed'.

Ma tells them 'well gentlemen, the map is in Tatters'. Anwar says pleased 'you mean it is already destroyed, good, then the secret is still safe'. Ma hints to the children by saying 'yes, as my young friends would say you'll never collar it now'. Colin and Franny whisper the word 'collar'. Hellman says 'all my work has been for nothing and I've wasted my time tracing you cousin'. Ma Mossop tells him to remember and starts to sing underneath the lamplight, by the barricades. Franny whispers to Colin to get him to hurry, he unravels the map. Smith, losing patience with Ma Mossop's singing says 'that's enough of that sentimental twaddle'. He tells them 'I don't believe you've destroyed that map, now come on, tell me where it's hidden or somebody's going to get hurt'. Ma Mossop disregards his threat, Smith protests 'I warn you, I'm serious'. Anwar counters 'yes, but not very impressive'. Smith tells him to shut up and Ma asks him 'just what is your interest in all this Mr Smith'? Smith answers 'haven't you ever heard of a certain Mr Grandison'? Ma Mossop replies 'ah, you're no longer with MI5'. Smith reassures her 'money speaks to us all Ma, I've no intention of ending up like you Major Mossop'. Ma Mossop surmises 'so we're all after Mr Grandison's dollars are we'?

Colin and Franny crawl out from underneath the table and calls them 'traitors'. Hellman says 'children, again'. Ma Mossop asks them 'you found what you were looking for', they answer 'yes' and Ma says 'gentlemen, they have the map, give it to me'. Smith tells them he wants the map and Hellman tells them the map is his. Franny counters 'tell us what you'd do with it and then we'll decide who gets it'. Smith protests 'ha, you'll decide, you tell me why I just don't clip you round the ears and take the map'. Anwar tells him 'Mr Smith, you will do as the children have asked'. Smith agrees 'ok, no problem, well I've done a very nice deal for myself with Mr Grandison, the rich American. Now if you let me have the map you'd get ooh, a whole hundred pounds to share between you as a reward, ok. I'll give you an address, you just drop the map in the post and you won't get into trouble'. Colin tells Hellman 'now it's your turn Mr Hellman or Clarke, whatever your real name is'. Hellman replies 'the map is useless without knowing where the marker is in the desert, the tomb can never be found after all this time without my knowledge. I'm just waiting for the person who gets the map to beg for my help'. Ma tells him 'you're getting very high and mighty cousin', Hellman rebukes 'oh don't give me that madge, the moment you heard about Grandison you were on that phone offering to sell him the map'. Colin tells them to shut up and Franny asks Anwar. Anwar doesn't respond, Franny asks him 'don't you want the map'. Anwar replies 'you know my life and the safety of my great King rests in your hands'. Smith wants to know who gets the map and so does Hellman. Colin says 'Anwar, come with us'. Smith and Hellman disagree but Ma Mossop reassures them 'no, no, no, let them go, they can't escape'. Colin, Franny go into the back shop and Anwar follows them and draws the curtains between the front and back shop. Smith asks 'what's going on in there', Ma sniffs and replies 'I can smell burning'. Smith agrees and he and Hellman run through to the back shop where Anwar is holding a plate with paper on fire, he says 'oh great Ra, let flames devour, thy sacred power shall never die'. Smith and Hellman are angry, Anwar puts the plate down and begins to walk off, he says 'I am yesterday, today and tomorrow, for I am born again and again'. Colin and Franny smile at him, he gestures goodbye to the children and he walks into the front shop as Ma Mossop uses her gadget to unlock the door. Ma Mossop states 'well, hardly worth staying now, is it'. Hellman pushes Smith to the side and threatens the children 'you'll be sorry one day, mark my words', he leaves after saying 'goodbye cousin'. Smith says 'oh by the way Major', Ma Mossop replies 'goodbye Mr Smith' and he leaves. Ma Mossop says 'well, that's that, now children, to business'. Franny tells her she has to get shopping for her mum and Colin tells her 'I don't want anything from you', he puts the dictaphone down on the table. Ma isn't bothered and picks up Tatters. Colin tells Ma Mossop 'I don't like you' and Franny adds 'you're sneaky'. Ma Mossop asks 'so I'm sneaky, what's wrong with that'? Franny can only say 'because it's sneaky', Colin adds 'spies in real life are horrible, I'm glad you didn't get the map'. Franny points out 'you don't seem worried that Anwar burnt the map Mrs Mossop'. Ma Mossop laughs and tells them 'because he did exactly what I want him to do'. The children are confused, Ma Mossop explains 'I wanted you to find that map tonight because I knew you'd give it to him and I knew he'd destroy it. I've got a copy, all I need is that er photograph my cousin gave to you'. Colin questions her by saying 'photo'. Ma Mossop explains 'yes, the map is useless without that photograph with all the clues on it, so come on, hand it over'. Colin tells her 'I can't'. Ma Mossop sternly asks again 'don't give me that young man, give it to me', Colin tells her again 'I can't'. Ma Mossop asks 'why not'? He walks closer to and points to the burnt ashes on the plate and says 'because it's in there'. Ma Mossop spits 'you mean'. Colin confirms 'yes, Anwar burnt it with the map, that's all that's left'. Ma Mossop shouts 'get out, clear off, I never want to see you again, get out off'. Franny walks through to the front shop, Colin follows, turns round about to draw the curtains and says 'sorry Ma, nothing's ever what it seems eh', he walks through to the front shop to catch up with Franny, he triumphantly says 'that was telling her'. Franny tells him 'Colin don't start all that again, going to the shops for my mum and then I'm going home'. Colin tells her 'hey Franny, I've got the photo and the copy of the map we drew', Franny says 'Colin' but he reassures her 'I'm going to take it to the Police'. Franny tells him 'Colin, I don't want to know, I don't care where you take it. You play as spies if you want but I've got real things to do'. Colin adds 'me too', Franny leaves, Colin is about to leave but he turns round and calls out to Ma Mossop 'Agent C.A.B signing off', he leaves as he says 'bye Tatters', the episode ends with a close up of Tatters.